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#‎OttawaPolice NoMeansNo‬

“Here I am, finding myself sharing this post again. I’ve decided to come out, to stop hiding. This happened to me, and I don’t have to be ashamed of it. I’m deciding to come out, because I want women, and men to know that they are not alone. I want people to understand that THIS is a REAL problem in our society. My point isn’t to “bash” this guy, my point is to support other people. My point is to make people realize that we need to do something about this issue. My point is to make a difference. My point is to show other people that it IS possible to stay strong, even if the justice system isn’t fair. My point is to bring an improvement to the justice system. My point, is to show victims, that they are not alone. And most importantly, my point is to make people understand that no, means no.”
Mélodie Morin

06nov15_ottawa(Version française inclue ci-bas.)

AN OPEN LETTER TO THE OTTAWA POLICE DEPARTMENT
TW: RAPE

SIGN AND SHARE ON CHANGE.ORG

(Sidenote: I have been approved to write this by the victim in question Mélodie Morin, who has recently decided to come out.)

On the 25th of September, a good friend of mine was raped near the uOttawa campus by an acquaintance and fellow student at the University. Immediately following the incident she called the police and was taken to the Ottawa Civic Hospital where they performed a rape kit and documented the trauma to her body. There were bruises on her face and body, choking marks on her neck and damage to her internal organs. In the weeks following the assault she complied with police, giving interview after interview, and reliving the trauma of that night in the hopes her rapist would see justice. Since that night she has also suffered from symptoms of severe PTSD including panic attacks, flashbacks, and violent night terrors. She has dropped out of her university program due to stress and depression following the attack. Today, November 4th 2015, she received a call alerting her that her case file had been closed due to the incident being just a “misunderstanding”.

I ask you, what is so difficult to understand about the word NO?

Did he misunderstand her crying for foreplay?
The way she screamed for arousal?

During their police interviews, both parties gave the same story of what happened that night. They both recounted how he texted her to invite her to his roommate’s party, how he invited her into his bedroom under a pretense other than to engage in sexual activities. When questioned if he understood that NO means NO, he agreed that he did. However, he “thought it was still consensual”. I don’t know about you, but where I come from, saying that you continued to have sex with someone after they said NO is called a confession.

A quote from the police officer assigned to her case, “He said he thought it was consensual, so I have to believe him. Otherwise, I would have to believe everything you’ve said.”

The ONLY “punishment” that has resulted from the investigation is that he has been ASKED by the police department not to contact her further. Apparently she is not even worth a proper restraining order. Despite this, he has contacted her THREE TIMES since the assault, and the police are aware of this. STILL he has not been disciplined AT ALL.

Does this sound like justice to you? Is this how you want your police department to deal with instances of sexual assault? If you don’t support this kind of treatment of sexual assault victims by the justice system: Please share this story and spread the word of what happens to women when they report their assaults. Tell the Ottawa Police Department that you do not stand for this behavior. Tell them to re-open her case and bring rapists to justice. Tell the Ottawa Police Department that NO always means NO.

‪#‎OttawaPoliceNoMeansNo‬

VERSION FRANÇAISE:

Une lettre ouverte adressée au Service de la police d’OTTAWA
Préavis: DESCRIPTION D’UN VIOL

(Nota Bene : La victime en question, Mélodie Morin a accepté que j’écris cette lettre.)
Le 25 septembre, une bonne amie à moi a été violée à proximité du campus de l’Université d’Ottawa par une connaissance et un autre étudiant à l’Université. Immédiatement après l’incident, elle a appelé la police et a été emmenée à l’Hôpital Civic d’Ottawa où ils lui ont administré une trousse de viol et ont documenté les traumatismes infligés à son corps. Il y avait des ecchymoses sur son visage et son corps, des marques d’étranglement à son cou et des lésions à ses organes internes. Dans les semaines suivant l’agression, elle s’est pliée aux requêtes de la police, donnant entrevue après entrevue, revivant ainsi le traumatisme de cette nuit-là dans l’espoir que son violeur soit traduit en justice. Depuis cette nuit, elle a également souffert de symptômes de stress post-traumatique sévère, y compris des attaques de panique, des flashbacks, et de violentes terreurs nocturnes. Elle a abandonné son programme d’études universitaires en raison du stress et d’une dépression qui ont suivi cette attaque. Aujourd’hui, 4 novembre 2015, elle a reçu un appel l’avisant que son dossier avait été fermé, l’incident ayant été classé comme simple « malentendu ».

Je vous demande, ce qui est si difficile à comprendre au sujet du mot NON?

L’agresseur a-t-il interprété ses pleurs comme des préliminaires?
Ses cris pour de l’excitation?

Dans leurs dépositions à la police, les deux parties ont donné le même récit de ce qui est arrivé cette nuit-là. Ils ont tous deux raconté comment il lui a envoyé un texto pour l’inviter à la fête de son colocataire, comment il l’a invitée dans sa chambre sous un prétexte autre que le projet d’avoir des activités sexuelles. Interrogé à savoir s’il comprenait que NON signifie NON, il a reconnu le comprendre. Cependant, il dit avoir pensé « qu’il avait quand même son consentement ». Je ne sais pas ce qui en est pour vous, mais d’où je viens, reconnaître avoir continué à avoir des relations sexuelles avec vous après que cette personne vous ait dit NON, constitue un aveu.

Voici une citation directe de l’agent de police affecté à son cas : « Il a dit qu’il pensait que c’était consensuel, donc je dois le croire. Sinon, je devrais croire tout ce que vous avez dit. »

La SEULE «punition» qui a résulté de l’enquête est que le service de police a DEMANDÉ à l’agresseur de ne plus communiquer avec la victime. Apparemment, celle-ci ne mérite même pas une ordonnance de protection en bonne et due forme. Malgré cela, il a communiqué TROIS FOIS avec elle depuis l’agression, et la police en est informée. Pourtant, il n’a TOUJOURS pas reçu LA MOINDRE sanction.

Est-ce que cela ressemble à de la justice à vos yeux? Est-ce la façon dont vous voulez que votre service de police gère les cas d’agression sexuelle? Si vous n’appuyez pas ce genre de traitement des victimes d’agression sexuelle par l’appareil pénal, veuillez partager ce compte rendu, pour faire savoir ce qui arrive aux femmes quand elles rendent compte de leurs agressions. Informez le Service de police d’Ottawa que vous ne tolérez pas ce comportement. Dites-leur de ré-ouvrir sa cause et de traduire les violeurs en justice. Informez le Service de police d’Ottawa que NON signifie toujours NON.

‪#‎OttawaPoliceNoMeansNo‬

By | 2016-10-21T21:42:59+00:00 November 6th, 2015|Categories: Sexual Assault|Tags: , , , , , , , |8 Comments

8 Comments

  1. Mary Lawson November 8, 2015 at 3:51 pm

    This person should be dealt with as a RAPIST! My goodness the poor woman went through all that to be slapped in the face! Please do not give up and go to your university for help! This guy is a RAPIST

  2. rob jalbert November 8, 2015 at 12:13 pm

    I would check the suspect out real good because I am sure his parents have a friend or relative in this police force and this is their way of smoothing this over. Disgusting
    +

  3. Kevin November 8, 2015 at 11:17 am

    Maybe we should relabel it as sexual bullying, they seem to pay more attention to that these days .IE take it seriously because its more political and have to do something..

  4. Elizabeth Hopkins November 8, 2015 at 10:51 am

    Unfortunately police and even doctors do not understand that “No means No”. If we’re not teaching people this at all levels, then there isn’t much hope of anyone ever getting it.

  5. patti roberts November 7, 2015 at 6:19 pm

    It’s 2015. Why are police acting like it’s 1215. Handling rape like this is NOT acceptable!

  6. Nancy Crouse November 7, 2015 at 11:36 am

    Yes and this seems to be more common place than people realize. I am a survivor but my rapist/abuser is enabled by my mother. Most police are very understanding when it comes to rape and sexual assault but the few who are “dicks” should not be in contact with victims nor their rapists. This is a prime example of incompetence and degradation at its finest. Civil suit perhaps against the police department?

  7. Fred Bushor November 7, 2015 at 4:29 am

    Stupid, insensitive f**king police causing MORE trauma to citizens expecting help.

    • Glen Canning November 8, 2015 at 7:15 am

      Statistically almost 80% of those who do report either end up feeling abandoned or devastated. It’s time to change this broken system!!!

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